So You Think You're a Good Wife?

I think I'm a pretty good wife.  It's easy enough for me to look around and find people who are cheating on their spouse, constantly bickering with one another, show no affection, and so on, to make me feel good about how I'm doing.    And it seems like a really popular message these days for women is "don't be too hard on yourself" and maybe this IS a message lots of women, mothers especially, need to hear.  But I think often as wives, we could use a little shove in the other direction.  A little more tough love.

See, when we compare ourselves to the world, we may come out looking pretty good.  But if you're a Christian, there is a higher standard. This is where maybe you're worried I'm going to start talking about submission, but I don't even have to go there.  Let's instead look at a passage everyone loves: 1 Corinthians 13.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Cor 13: 4-7)

This is not the mushy, feel good verse it's often made out to be.  This is hard stuff.  There is no clause in this verse that says "Love is patient and kind ... when you are being loved in return".  And sure, you can say "But my husband is supposed to love me like this too!", and you'd be right.  But see, you aren't responsible for him - you are responsible for you.

Read the rest at Growing Home, where I am very honoured to be guest posting for one of my dearest real-life friends!